13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

Someone shared this in my FB feed and I’m posting the link here as a reminder for myself, and for future reference. I do find myself committing some of these don’ts, which is bad so I need to be more conscious of my own thoughts and catch them while they occur, and try to redirect them to a more positive direction.



High Tech Panties Won’t Stop Rape

This article (and accompanying comments) gives a good explanation of what ‘blaming the victim’ is and why any society which holds the notion that ‘women should be dressed a certain way because it is for their own protection’ is actually perpetuating rape culture

The Belle Jar

There is currently an Indiegogo campaign created by AR Wear for a line that they call Anti-Rape Clothing. These garments, which include a pair of boy-cut brief-style panties, running shorts, leggings and “travelling shorts,” are allegedly designed and built to be unremovable except by the owner, who has some sort of key to release the locking mechanism on the waistband. Basically they act as a chastity belt, although of course we are not supposed to think of them as chastity belts. AR Wear wants us to believe that this is some sort of modern innovation, and not just a contemporary twist on an outdated garment meant to oppress and subjugate women. In fact, AR Wear wants us to believe that the opposite is true – that their anti-rape wear will actually empower women and offer them some sort of freedom that they might have been lacking.

Let’s get a few…

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Hipster Muslim, Slouching toward Mecca & other fabulousness

Reblogging this so that I can come back to it and devour the Absolutely Fabulous reads one at a time. 🙂

Love, InshAllah

Absolutely Fabulous: logo BBC/Lionheart Source: Warner Home Video Direct

Some phenomenal recent reads:

Author, LoveinshAllah.com editor, and anthology contributor Deonna Kelli in Slouching toward Mecca:

“I sat in many church pews as a child and I dipped in many waters. My paternal grandmother made sure that I had a proper Methodist christening. Thirteen years later, I dunked into Southern Baptist waters by my own conviction. Men in my family did not take me to church or talk too much about God. By the time I drank from the Zamzam Well in Mecca, men had started to determine how I interpreted my faith.

That was fine – for a while.”

Novelist, academic and contributor to the upcoming Salaam, Love: American Muslim Men on Love, Sex & Intimacy (February 2014) anthology Haroon Moghul writes about his visit to Jerusalem in A Place for Women:

“Though [American Muslims] have gotten some kind of handle on pluralism, over gender we still…

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Tips For Writers

I recently read something which may explain why that person did something which is equivalent to a (virtual / online) snub.


But then, I read this piece by a blogger whose sentiment on how the world treats half of the human population is one I share, and this struck me: “Write because you are the only person who has lived your particular life, and this has shaped your thoughts in such a way that you are the only one on this planet capable of expressing a thought in your own particular way.”


I may have strong opinions on some things which others can always dismiss  (or ridicule) as ‘overreacting’ or ‘making an issue out of the smallest things’, but here’s the thing: my opinions are based on my observations and experiences in my own life which no one else has lived. So, write I will.


Weddings are once in a lifetime, yet they are but one out of the many things that happen in a lifetime. The wedding would come and go, but the marriage that comes after would (hopefully) last a lifetime, and the way the world treats half the human population would last many many lifetimes.


So, my writing may not be for everyone (and you may eliminate me from your reading list if you so wish), but I know there are other souls out there who would agree with me, or even if they don’t at first, they are willing to challenge the ways they have been taught, or socialised, to look at life and the world. So, write I will.

The Belle Jar

Write because you have something to say.

Write because you’ve always wanted to.

Write because you only just realized that you might die next week, or tomorrow, or five minutes from now, and you want to leave something behind for posterity.

Write because you have a secret fire burning inside of you and the only way that you can fan the flames is by sharing your thoughts with someone else.

Write because you’re bored and don’t have anything better to do.

Write for yourself.

Write for other someone else, or maybe everyone else.

Write because you love seeing your stats counter surge every time you post something. Write because nothing satisfies you quite so much as seeing others share what you’ve written. Write because you like the attention; there’s nothing wrong with liking the attention.

Write because it fills the emptiness in your heart or your soul or your pancreas…

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Fervently Fantastic

Love this! As a child, not a potential parent, that is… Wish someone told this to MY parents, even now…

Love, InshAllah

Kulsoom K. Ijaz 1

Our parents named us after Islamic figures in hopes that we would grow up to be just like them. They wished that somehow having an identical name would breed an identical character. But parenting does not work that way. You can’t just name a person Fatima or Maryum or Omar or Ali and expect them all to run their course in a devout and compliant direction.

It’s not that simple. “Children aren’t coloring books. You don’t get to fill them with your favorite colors.” Khaled Hosseini wrote that in The Kite Runner. Picking a name for some parents tends to be their favorite “go to” crayon. But children aren’t two dimensional cartoon characters.

So when they grow up throughout the years and make decisions in beautiful dichotomy of their respective parents’ compulsive expectations it should never come as a surprise. Because here is the other thing, children cannot be…

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